Exploring Sobriety and Alcohol Awareness

Speaker 1 0:00

Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast , the go-to resource for women seeking to have a deeper understanding of the role alcohol plays in their lives , women who are looking to drink less or not at all for any reason . I am your host , christi Walker . I'm a wife , mom and a joy-filled Catholic , and I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach , and I am so glad you're here . If you have been playing the moderation game with alcohol for a while and you have started to realize that perhaps moderation isn't going to work for you , then this podcast episode is for you . Often when we've been trying to moderate , setting boundaries about I'll only drink at this time , I'll only drink this type of alcohol , I'll only do X , y , z and we put up these boundaries and perimeters for ourselves . But we continually find that we are stepping over them , that we're breaking them , that it's just actually causing a lot of chaos and anxiety to even think about it and it's taking a lot of your energy . And that's not good , because the reason that you probably want to stop drinking or be able to moderate in a way that works for you is because you're finding that thinking about alcohol , drinking alcohol and then recovering from drinking alcohol is taking way too much time . So if moderating drinking is taking that much time or more , then it can seem like why even bother , right ? So what many people do is they decide that they are going to take a break from alcohol . It looks different for everyone . Some people choose to start with just seven days . I think that if you are a regular drinker , that is a great place to start . However , when you can go for longer amounts of time , that is when you will begin to experience the benefits of not drinking , which I will touch on at the end of this podcast episode as well . But first I just want to talk about how to get through that first week of sobriety . These tips will be perfect for you as you get through that first week , and then maybe you move on to a month , maybe you will move on to 60 days , 90 days , 100 days , maybe even a year . But you don't have to think about that now . Let's just talk about getting you through that first week of sobriety , of abstaining from alcohol .

Speaker 1 2:49

Now the first thing I want to let you know actually , there's two things . The first thing is to stop drinking . To quit drinking , to realize that you do not want alcohol in your life anymore does not require a label of any kind . You don't have to identify yourself as anything . You can just choose not to drink . It doesn't mean anything about you . It doesn't mean anything about your drinking habit .

Speaker 1 3:19

Sometimes people get a little scared or fearful about saying I'm not going to drink anymore , because they're afraid that the people will automatically assume oh , she's an alcoholic . Now I will say this may have been true years ago , but I'm finding that more and more people just are not drinking just because , like they just realize that it is not good for their body , it's not good for their mental health , for their spiritual well-being and overall it is not serving them at all . So the first thing is you don't have to have a label to decide that you want to stop drinking . The second thing is something that people think that they have to hit a rock bottom or they have to be like an everyday drinker or they have to have some kind of dire reason for quitting drinking or examining their alcohol consumption , and that is simply not true . You do not have to have a drinking problem to realize that alcohol is becoming a problem for you and that is going to look different for everyone . If it is causing any amount of chaos . You don't have to explain anything to anyone , you don't have to label yourself and you definitely do not have to hit a rock bottom . Or alcohol doesn't have to be causing a level of chaos where you're ending up getting DUIs , you're not showing up for work , you're driving around with your kids in the car drunk . It doesn't have to be that extreme to realize that maybe alcohol is not serving you . Okay , so let's talk about getting through that first week alcohol-free .

Speaker 1 5:10

The first thing that I recommend is to stop romanticizing alcohol and , yes , that is easier said than done , but a really good way to do that is something that I do with my clients right away , which is we talk about the pros of alcohol and the cons of alcohol . You can do it in a journal . I recommend when you are going on a journey toward alcohol freedom , to eliminate or reduce alcohol from your life . I completely , 100% recommend keeping a journal , even if you're not like a journaler or somebody who likes to write . Even just taking little notes bullet point notes each day will help you , so that you can go back and look at the awareness that you've gained and realize what's working , what's not working , what needs tweaked , where are my urges coming from and those types of things . So I highly recommend keeping a journal . If you don't want to call it a journal and you want to call it a list or whatever , it's fine , but it's very , very beneficial . And again , you can go back and look at that later .

Speaker 1 6:27

So you're either going to take a piece of paper , fold it in half , have a pro side and a con side , or you're going to have a journal . Open up your journal . On one side of the page will be the pros , one side of the page will be the cons . You are going to take off your rosé colored glasses . You are going to take off your rosé colored glasses and start writing and start thinking . So alcohol definitely does something for you . It gives you something , which is why you continually go back to it . So think about all those things and write them on the pros side . And write them on the pros side .

Speaker 1 7:09

And then I want you to think about all the things that alcohol takes away from you , all the ways that it prevents you from living the life you desire or the life that you want to create . And again , that can look different for everyone . That can be feeling zapped of creativity and having low energy that can be consistently breaking promises to yourself and others . It can even be not remembering the entirety of an event or occasion because you were maybe you weren't like super quote , unquote , drunkquote , quote drunk , but maybe you were buzzed or intoxicated enough that your memories are hazy , fuzzy , foggy and you don't quite remember anything because you just , essentially , were numbed out . It can also be you're just tired of celebrations always revolving around alcohol and maybe you're just bored with drinking and you're always looking for that next thing , that better bottle of wine , that fancier cocktail , whatever it is . The things that used to satisfy you don't anymore . Your tolerance has increased and things like that . So if you are tired of those things , then that can be something to look at , to write down and that will help you to stop romanticizing alcohol and making it seem better than it is .

Speaker 1 8:40

When you think about romanticizing alcohol too and this will be my last point on this is think about alcohol commercials . Think about how they're always showing like people all together having fun , maybe relaxing , maybe on a beautiful vacation . They're always showing just the positive side of what we have come to believe as drinking alcohol . What those commercials don't show is poor decisions being made , feeling crummy the next day , having health conditions , waking up with anxiety , increased anxiety or depression . It never shows that side of it . Of course that would be ridiculous , because then they wouldn't sell any alcohol .

Reframing Alcohol Habits

Speaker 1 9:32

But we kind of got to see that with the tobacco industry , right . So we used to see all these glamorous people with cigarettes and you could smoke anywhere , and anyone that smoked was very , oh , sophisticated . And then we started realizing what cigarette smoking was actually doing . And pretty soon we saw these commercials . Do you remember these commercials With people with like a hole in their throat talking and telling us how cigarette smoke caused them to have lung cancer , throat cancer , and they didn't have their voice anymore , they had to speak with through , like , this hole in their throat . I mean , it was very hard to watch . So if alcohol commercials were honest , I don't think as many people would be drinking . But I digress because I was talking about romanticizing it . So if you think about romanticizing , it's not the truth . It's just kind of a mask , a facade of what we think it is . So reminding ourselves of what comes after is very important .

Speaker 1 10:45

Okay , now I'm just going to give you a quick list of tips that are going to help you go alcohol-free for your first weekend beyond . Of tips that are going to help you go alcohol-free for your first weekend beyond . The first is to stock up on alcohol-free drinks and I would even suggest , if you can , to get rid of the alcohol that is in your home or at least put it somewhere that is difficult to get to or it would be . It's kind of out of sight , out of mind . A lot of people that quit drinking tend to like to get sparkling waters . You can . I mean , if you're , if you're interchanging that for alcohol , you can afford to get like the fancy sparkling waters , like the San Pellegrino or Izzy Sodas or something . The sparkling waters we tend to go with , like the ones that are not as expensive . But I mean if you're changing that out for alcohol , which , if you're looking at the price between the fancy sparkling sparkling waters and the alcohol that you're consuming , I think you're probably going to still be saving money if you have that .

Speaker 1 11:50

And then I always think that it's fun to come up with mocktails or other fun drinks that don't involve alcohol . So just kind of playing around with that , having fun seeing what types of alcohol-free drinks that you like . Go on Pinterest . If you go on Pinterest and look up mocktails or alcohol-free drinks . You will get tons of fun recipes . And I invite you this summer especially because I'm recording this in the summer or if you're listening to this during the holiday season , when you are entertaining just start incorporating some of those fun mocktails . Maybe make a mocktail bar with lots of different types of garnishments and flavors to be added , and just have a fun time with it .

Speaker 1 12:40

The second thing is to completely change your routine . So if one of your routines is you leave work , you drive by the grocery store or wherever like around here you can get alcohol pretty much in any store or the liquor store and then you grab whatever alcohol you want for that day and then you go home . I would recommend going a completely different way , like not going by that place where you usually stop . So just make that little tweak . It may take you a couple extra minutes to get home , but it will be worth it because you're avoiding that near occasion of sin , if you will . And then the other thing is think about the time of day when you usually drink . So if it's usually after you put your kids to bed , if it's while you're making dinner , then I think that the best idea is always to just kind of change that up as much as possible . So if you have the habit and we do have these well-worn path habits , and it doesn't have to be that you drink alcohol every day , it can even just be a couple times a week , it can be once a week or a couple times a month , but we still have these habits so think about those habit paths that you created and then just kind of change that around .

Speaker 1 15:10

So if it's putting the kids to bed , you go into the kitchen , you grab a glass of wine , you go and sit down in

Practical Tips for Alcohol-Free Living

Speaker 1 15:16

front of the TV or out back on your patio or whatever it is , then I would encourage you to think of something else . Maybe have a pretty glass with some sparkling water , some lime , something in it , like a cute little treat , mocktail type treat ready for you , or ask your spouse to put it together for you while you're putting the kids to bed . Or maybe ask your spouse to put the kids to bed while you make this fun new mocktail for the both of you to enjoy out on the back patio or wherever you are . The key is to be creative . Just let those creative juices flow and focus on all that you will gain by taking a break and do your best not to focus on what you're giving up , because I guarantee you what you're going to gain is going to give you far , far more than anything that you've given up . Especially once you are kind of far removed for it you'll really be able to see how much you have gained . It can be really hard when you're close to it and you're in it , but as you move farther away and detach from it , the more we detach and break away those chains , the easier it is to actually see alcohol and or have it for what it really is and also look at it without judgment . Just look at it like yeah , that was tough , but I'm kind of on the other side of it now .

Speaker 1 16:52

The other thing is to just say no to events that you don't want to go to . So a lot of people will tell me that the reason that they drink is really for connection and to fit in and also to relieve their social anxiety . So if you're feeling a lot of social anxiety about an event , especially in your first week or 30 days , and if you can say no to that event , do it , because you'll have more peace in that than if you make yourself do something and then you're miserable trying to get through it . I'm not saying that you have to say no to events or ever . I'm just saying be more discerning of your yes and that will help you to say no to things that you may just feel an obligation to do but you don't really actually have to do .

Speaker 1 17:51

My other tip is to plan and prepare . Now I would equate this a lot to what I do every week , which is meal planning . So I have a family of five and it benefits us greatly when I can actually look at the week , what events we have going and and all of that , and then plan out meals , what I'm going , make the shopping list of the ingredients that I need and then actually take the action of going shopping and getting those ingredients . And that makes it so much easier because when dinnertime rolls around , I'm not frantically scraping up what ingredients do we have ? What can I put together with hummus and bacon bits and spaghetti noodles ? What can I make out of that ? I mean , that sounds horrible . I would never do that to my family . But what I'm trying to say is that planning will help you to ensure your best result , just like meal planning , ordering groceries and then getting the groceries and ensuring that I have all those items I need makes it so that our dinners are so much more delicious and enjoyable .

Speaker 1 19:11

So I have an episode it is called Navigating Events and Celebrations with a Party Protocol . It's episode 49 . And in that episode I kind of break down how to have a protocol for an event and then that will help you go into the event prepared so that you're not instantly reacting or drinking just because you're kind of thrown off or you didn't have a plan . So that's a great episode for you to look at . I also have another episode episode 54 , that is called how to rock a party without alcohol , even if you are an introvert . So this can be very helpful as you plan and prepare and it can also be helpful as you're discerning what events that you really actually do want to go to .

Speaker 1 20:05

Another tip that I have for you is to distract yourself when an urge comes up . Now I have a free guide . You can find it in the show notes . It's called Drink Less or Not at All a Catholic Guide to Freedom , and in that I have a bunch of tools that will help you gain clarity and confidence around your drinking .

Speaker 1 20:24

But one of the tools that is in there is to make a list of 50 things that you can do instead of drinking . So things that you like to do . That can be maybe give yourself a facial or a pedicure , or go for a walk or play a board game . It can be lots of different things . You don't have to fill out all 50 things in one sitting . Like you can add to it as you . 50 things in one sitting , like you can add to it as you remember . Things or activities pop into your mind . I also always suggest thinking about things that you used to love to do before you started drinking , like things that used to give you a lot of joy when you were a kid . That can be like different crafts or hobbies . Think about those things and find ways to incorporate those into your life now . But there's no shame in distracting yourself . If you have an urge , go to that list of things that you've written down and pick the one that sounds the best at that moment .

Speaker 1 21:24

Another thing that may or may not sound very fun to you is to actually educate yourself about alcohol and its effects on your body , mind and just your overall well-being . Now I have a lot of episodes on my podcast that relate to that , but a quick google search will tell you a lot of things if you are looking to really educate yourself on alcohol and its effects on the body . It is a toxic substance . I know people don't like to hear that . I know people don't like to think that , but honestly , the more you know about the toxicity of the substance and how alcohol does to our body and our brain , what it's designed to do , what it is , the less judgment you have on yourself , the less you beat yourself up and you realize like , oh , this is why it's science . So just go and educate yourself about alcohol and its effects on your body , whether that's listening to this podcast , googling . Just make sure that when you're Googling , you are looking at reputable sources , trusted sources that are going to provide you with reliable information .

Speaker 1 22:46

The next tip I have for you is not to rely on willpower . Don't white knuckle it . Instead , I want you to harness the power of divine determination . Invite the Lord in , invite the Holy Spirit to strengthen your gifts , because when your spiritual gifts are strengthened and you are working and using those gifts , then the fruits of the Spirit will just show up in your life , those fruits of peace and joy and love , all of those beautiful fruits that we get from using our spiritual gifts , those gifts that God gave us at our baptism . They are ours by virtue of our baptism . We just have to unwrap them and use them . So learn more about your gifts , about the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit , learn your charisms , and that will really really help you to cultivate virtue as you're rooting out the vice , and you'll just find that you just have far more peace .

Speaker 1 23:58

And then the last thing is to shift your mindset from FOMO to JOMO . So I want you to consciously think again . This can be in your journal or your note taking note , bullet point book whatever is most comfortable for you . Focus on what you are gaining in the process of letting go of detaching from alcohol . Focus on the joy of missing out , not the fear of missing out . The joy of missing out . When you think about all the things you're gaining instead of all the things that you aren't doing because you're not drinking , it just kind of flips the switch in your brain and it makes it so much easier to resist those urges when they come . And if you have them written down , it makes it even easier because sometimes , when we're in the midst of an urge or craving , we don't want to think about those things . Our brain doesn't want to think about those things . So if we can go to our notebook and look at all the things that we've written , that we've gained notes , that we've made , then that is going to help so much to remember why , remember your why .

Speaker 1 25:29

Okay , so at the top of the show I said that I would briefly explain or maybe mention some of the benefits that you are going to experience when you go alcohol-free . So one of the things in week one is that your sleep pattern will have improved . If you have an Apple Watch or some kind of an app or something that tracks your sleep patterns , I would invite you to look at that and just notice the changes to your sleep . It's going to be less disruptive and then during the day you're also going to realize that maybe you have more mental clarity and focus and you're more creative . And then in about week two , most people say that they have , if they are experiencing , acid reflux . That kind of goes away , and also people that have or are experiencing gut health issues notice that that subsides as well around week one or two and then about week three . I don't know if you have blood pressure issues , but if you do , that can reduce as well . That means that your risk of heart problems or stroke greatly reduces greatly reduces .

Speaker 1 26:50

By week four , and maybe sooner , you'll notice that your skin is looking better because you are just more well hydrated , that your skin has like a healthier glow , and that you know it just looks better by week four . This is exciting . Your liver function has recovered . Our livers are amazing . So , unless you have some kind of liver disease that cannot be reduced , after about four weeks your liver function has recovered and the liver plays a role in over 500 vital processes it removes contaminants , converts food nutrients , stores minerals and vitamins , regulates blood clotting , produces protein , enzymes and bile , helps fight infection , it removes bacteria from the blood , it maintains hormonal health and you get more energy . So we want to keep our livers in prime condition and so by the time that four week mark has arrived , for most of us liver function is recovered . So those are just a few of the many , many benefits that you can expect when you decide to take a break from alcohol . I hope you found the tips on getting through your first week alcohol-free and beyond , are super beneficial for you .

Speaker 1 28:22

I'm here for you , so if you have any questions , feel free to get in contact with me . I'm on Instagram at the Catholic Sobriety Coach . There's also an option in my show notes where you can send me a text . And don't forget to grab my free guide Drink Less or Not at All A Catholic Guide to Freedom . It has so many tools in there that can help you get started . Well , that does it for this episode of the Catholic Sobriety Podcast . I hope you enjoyed this episode and I would invite you to share it with a friend who might also get value from it as well , and make sure you subscribe so you don't miss a thing . I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach , and if you would like to learn how to work with me or learn more about the coaching that I offer , visit my website , thecatholicsobrietycoachcom . Follow me on Instagram at thecatholicsobrietycoach . I look forward to speaking to you next time , and remember I am here for you . I am praying for you . You are not alone . Thank you .